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  He bends his neck, bringing his mouth to mine. The kiss is soft and gentle, making my toes curl. “I want you back in school tomorrow,” he whispers against my lips.

  I open my eyes, staring at him with our faces close together. “Tomorrow? I have to take care of you, and who’s going to drive you back to the other coast?”

  Mammoth slides his hand up my spine, cupping the back of my head. “My truck is here. I can drive myself, and you’ve already missed enough school. It’s a shoulder, Tamara. I can survive with one arm.”

  I pull my head back, wanting to see his entire face. “It’s not a good idea. It’s too dangerous.”

  “Driving with one arm is dangerous?”

  I nod, keeping my face straight and serious. “Extremely dangerous.”

  “Not any more dangerous than being in a car with you when you’re using two hands.”

  “I’m a great driver,” I scoff.

  “Your bumper and fender would say otherwise.”

  “There’re a lot of blind spots when I’m parking. It’s not my fault.”

  He raises an eyebrow, knowing I’m full of shit.

  I am a horrible driver, but I don’t drive any worse or better than most everybody in the state of Florida. It’s the reason I haven’t had a new car in years. There’s no point with the miles I put on driving back and forth between college and home. Once I graduate and don’t have to do the I-75 driver dash every few days, I’ll be able to keep a car in pristine condition.

  Mammoth tightens his grip around the back of my neck, pulling my face closer again. “School tomorrow. Understand?”

  I twist my lips and mutter, “Fine.” Which is the exact opposite of how I feel about abandoning him during his time of need.

  “School is too important, and you’re too close to finishing to fuck it all up for me. I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time, babe. I can do it for a few days right now with one arm, and if I need anything, Pike, Gigi, Lily, Jett, and probably anyone from your family will be there to help.”

  “Promise me you’ll stay in my room for a few days at least until you and Tank work out the details. Don’t go trying to move in to that dirty-ass garage while you have an open wound that’s trying to heal.”

  He sighs, but I raise an eyebrow back at him because he has to know my logic isn’t wrong. If he wants me to give a little and go back to school, he needs to give a little too and at least try to stay healthy.

  “Fine,” he bites out, just as annoyed at being told what to do as I am.

  “Then we’re agreed.”

  “I’ll spend at least the first week in your apartment until I’m more healed, and your sweet ass is heading back to school.”

  I smile. “It’s a deal. I’ll even tell Gigi not to fawn over you too much while I’m gone, but make no mistake, I will be calling her to make sure you’re not overdoing things.”

  Mammoth pushes me back until I’m flush against the bed and he’s on top of me, propped up on his uninjured arm. “Absolutely no fawning.”

  I swallow, staring up into his seemingly bottomless gray eyes. “No fawning,” I repeat, whisper-soft.

  “I’m a grown man.”

  I nod as I slide my hands across his back, feeling every ridge and dip until they meet in the middle over his spine. “You’re grown.”

  “I don’t have anyone parked outside your apartment on campus to make sure you’re not doing anything crazy.”

  “I never do anything crazy.”

  He stares at me, waiting for me to crack and knowing damn well I do stupid shit all the time.

  “Well, not always,” I finally admit. “My course load is too heavy this year for shenanigans anyway.”

  “Thank fuck for small miracles,” he says against my lips as he steals my breath along with another piece of my heart.

  How have I fallen so fast and so hard for this man?

  He’s everything I said I wouldn’t love but somehow can’t resist.

  It’s like God wanted to play the greatest cosmic joke on me and remind me that I’m not the kick-ass independent chick I always thought I was.

  I used to think my mother was crazy as hell for putting up with my father, but now I get it. I understand her ability to look past his faults, of which there are many, and to focus only on his good.

  Mammoth isn’t an easy man, nor is he a perfect man. But he is perfect for me and easier than most. I’ve had my fair share of bad relationships. “Toxic Tamara” could’ve been my nickname before, but the day I met Mammoth, everything changed.

  I have a man who loves me. One who cares about me, my well-being, and my pleasure. I’ve hit the hottie badass biker jackpot without becoming an old lady. Thank God. I would’ve done a shit job at staying in the background, seen and not heard—no Gallo girl is ever good at staying silent.

  Mammoth lifts himself up with his one good arm and stares down at me. “There’re still a few hours of sunshine left. I want you back on campus before sundown and ready for class in the morning.”

  My frown is immediate and severe. “I’ll leave in the morning.”

  He shakes his head. “I want you to get a good night’s rest and get your shit in order. I don’t want you fighting rush-hour traffic, frantic that you’re late, and tired as hell from a night here at the compound.” He pushes up, kneeling between my legs.

  I gape up at him, my mouth opening and closing, ready to argue.

  “And before you give me any lip, you know I’m right,” he says before I have a chance to speak.

  I narrow my eyes, hating that he is, because I want nothing more than to lie in this bed, curled up in his arms all night. “Tomorrow’s Thursday. Maybe I should just skip it and start fresh on Monday.”

  “You’ve already missed enough school, Tamara. We’re not going to have an argument about this.”

  I pout, crossing my arms over my chest as I stare up at him. “I’m not ready to go.”

  His facial features soften. “I’m fine. I’ll continue to be fine too. I’m breathing and don’t need you falling further behind just so you can stare at me. Get your ass up, and get on the road.”

  I sit up and flatten my palms against the mattress, tilting my head. “Is that an order?”

  Mammoth laughs, shaking his head, knowing I’m being difficult and already used to my bullshit. “It’s an order, princess.”

  “One last fuck?” I ask, hoping to buy myself a little bit of time with my pussy.

  “You can have some more dick in forty-eight hours.”

  I grumble as he slides off the bed, making it impossible for me to reach for his belt and try to force myself upon him. “Fine. Fine. I’ll go,” I say, giving in to him. “But just so you know…” I stand near the edge of the bed and adjust my shirt. “I may not be in the mood on Friday.”

  “The mood?” he asks.

  “For dick, baby.”

  His laugh is loud and immediate. “Still a shit liar. You’re always in the mood.”

  That statement earns him two middle fingers. “We’ll see.”

  He reaches out, gripping my hip with his massive hand, digging those fingertips into the flesh just above my waistband. “You know you can never say no.”

  “I can too,” I say, but my voice cracks, betraying the hell out of me.

  “You’re not going to get me to change my mind. The sun is on the way down, and if you wait any longer, it’ll be too dangerous for you to go. Eagle and Ginger will look after me while I’m here.”

  I move as slow as molasses as I toe on my sandals. “I’m pretty sure those guys are already shit-faced.”

  Mammoth stalks toward me until his shadow covers me and he blocks out the overhead light. “I’m just going to sleep. I’m exhausted after the last few days and could really use a good night’s sleep to get my head on straight.”

  “You sleep so much better with me curled next to you.”

  He smiles. “I love how relentless you are.”

  “Only when it comes to
you.”

  “You’re dragging your feet, princess. It’s time to go. I’ll see you in two days.”

  I wrap my arm around his middle and place my head on his chest, listening to the steady, strong beat of his heart. A few days ago, I was petrified he’d die. Even now, standing here, it’s my greatest fear. “Promise me you’ll be careful.”

  “I promise,” he whispers against my hair as I breathe in the scent of his T-shirt and memorize his warmth.

  The heat of his body is gone a moment later. “Let’s get you in your car.”

  “Can we go out the back door?” I ask him. “I don’t want to walk through the bar area and see the guys.”

  I’m not in the mood, holding each of them partially responsible for Mammoth being alone and vulnerable when he was shot. I know they aren’t to blame, but petty is my middle name and grudges are something I can hold a lifetime.

  “Whatever you want,” he says.

  “I want to stay,” I mutter under my breath.

  But in under sixty seconds, we’re standing in the parking lot of the compound, my ass resting against the driver’s door of my car.

  “Call me when you get to your apartment and make it inside,” he tells me, running his knuckles down my cheek. “I want to know you’re safe.”

  “Why don’t you just come with me? I have my own place this year.”

  He shakes his head. “I have shit to tie up here before I can get gone for good.”

  I sigh. “Then come to my place tomorrow.”

  He wraps his fingers around my upper arms, squeezing me gently. “Baby, I’ll be a distraction, and I need to get my ass moving on the garage. By the time you graduate, I want the place to be remodeled, operating, and making money. I can’t lie around your apartment all day while you go to class. It’s not me. I wasn’t built to do nothing.”

  “But you’d look so good on my couch.”

  “How about this…” He strokes the skin on the back of my arm with his fingertips, giving me goose bumps even in the heat. “I’ll come visit you some weekends instead of you driving so far all the time.”

  “No way. I can’t miss my grandmother’s dinner on Sunday, and I need to see my family too. So, while that’s super sweet of you, that’s a negative, sparky.”

  “Sparky?” He furrows his eyebrows.

  I shrug. “It’s better than baby. You look like a sparky.”

  “Give me your lips before you go,” he says, his voice deep and gravelly.

  Without hesitation, I lift myself up on my tiptoes and tilt my head back to offer him my mouth like I’ve offered everything else to him in the past.

  One of his hands leaves my arm and moves to the back of my head, tugging on my hair. “I love you, princess.”

  “Love you too, sparky.” I smile as his lips crash down on mine, stealing my breath again. I memorize the taste of his lips, the softness of his tongue, the forcefulness of his mouth.

  He’ll be okay.

  He’s alive.

  He’s safe.

  I repeat those words to myself as he kisses me, remembering how very lucky we are the bullet didn’t hit a few inches over, finding his heart.

  “Bye,” I whisper when he pulls away and reaches behind me for the handle of my car door.

  “I’ll be waiting for your call.”

  I nod, holding back the tears as I curl into the driver’s seat. I will not cry. I’m not a crier. I never have been and never will be. But if anyone could bring me to the brink, it’s him. Damn JD Saint and all of his manliness for making me weak.

  He shuts the door and waves me goodbye as I back out, my eyes going from the cement to him until he is nothing but a speck in the rearview mirror.

  He is fine.

  I am fine.

  We’ll be fine.

  6

  Mammoth

  The compound reeks of stale cigarettes and cheap beer as I stalk through the sea of bodies.

  “Mammoth!” Eagle yells across the room, rising from his spot on the couch next to his newest piece of ass. “Fuckin’ finally, man. Where the hell have you been? Texted you hours ago.”

  “Yo.” I lift my chin as I jam my keys into my pocket, trying to hide my disgust about being back here. “I went out for a ride in the truck to clear my head after Tamara left.”

  “I’ve been sitting here saving a cold beer for you.”

  “You sure about that?” I tick my head toward the half-dressed woman he just left. “Looks like you were busy with that brunette.”

  “Eh, you know I prefer blondes.” He gives me a toothy grin, nudging me with his elbow. “But my best friend beats cheap pussy any day.”

  I lift an eyebrow, knowing he’s full of shit.

  “Okay. Maybe you don’t always trump pussy—” he throws his thumb over his shoulder, pointing to the brown-haired woman who looks more like road trash than a runway model “—but you beat that piece of ass.”

  I slap him on the shoulder, laughing. “I feel special. Thanks, man.”

  “You should, asshole. The bitch doesn’t have real teeth.”

  My eyebrows furrow as I stare at him in confusion. She doesn’t have real teeth. What in the actual fuck? “Sounds tragic.”

  “Dude, you don’t know what you’re missing. Gum jobs are the best fuckin’ shit ever.”

  I blink, wondering if I heard him wrong but knowing I didn’t. “A gum job?” I cringe as my stomach rolls at the very thought, picturing her popping out her dentures to suck his cock.

  He stares me straight in the eyes and taps his finger against my chest. “You haven’t lived until you’ve had one. Trust me, brother.”

  Somehow, I hold back the vomit climbing up my throat. “You’re really fucked up.”

  His smile widens. “Was there ever any doubt?”

  “None,” I deadpan as Morris comes to stand beside us.

  “I’ll take one of those.” Morris motions toward Eagle’s beer.

  “Morris, I need you,” Ginger says from behind us. “There’s someone at the door.”

  Morris glares at Ginger. “Who?”

  “A woman.” Ginger shrugs, looking like he’s about to run. “She wouldn’t give a name. She’s just standing outside, shaking.”

  “Pussy is nothing but a headache,” he tells me, knocking his knuckles against the bar top before he brushes past Ginger, leaving us alone.

  I tip my head back, staring up at the ceiling. “Total asshole,” I whisper to no one but myself.

  Eagle pushes my beer bottle closer. “Stop pouting like a little bitch and drink up.”

  “Fuck off with that bullshit,” I tell him as I grab the beer, guzzling.

  “I can make you a spot of tea if you prefer,” Eagle teases. “Now that you’re fancy and shit.”

  I give him my middle finger as I take another drink.

  “Didn’t think so. This is my last night to drink with my best friend, and we’re going to do it right.”

  “It’s not like we’ll never see each other again.”

  He raises an eyebrow.

  “You’re family, man. You’re welcome in my home anytime,” I reassure him.

  “Would Tamara say the same?” he asks.

  “She would. She likes you for some crazy-ass reason I’ll never understand.”

  He leans forward, beer in hand, resting his arm against the bar. “She’s a good woman. You’re making the right choice. This—” he waves his hand in front of us to the room filled with drunken fools “—was never meant to be your life.”

  “I don’t deserve a woman like her.”

  Eagle straightens. “You’re the best of the best, Mammoth. Don’t let memories mess with your head.”

  “I’ve done some bad shit.”

  He places his hand on my good shoulder, squeezing. “You don’t go out of your way looking for trouble. We all make choices in life. Some good. Some bad. Shit happens. We move on.” Eagle’s dark eyes bore into me as he holds my gaze. “And it’s time for you to move on.”<
br />
  I try to soak in his words and believe what he’s saying is true. “It’s not that easy.”

  “Hey,” he says, slapping me lightly across the face. “I’ve never lied to you, and I’m not about to start now. You get as far away from this place as you can, and never look back. You hear me?”

  When I came to the Disciples, I needed them. I didn’t feel like I had a purpose after leaving the service. I was a boat without a rudder, wandering on an endless sea of nothingness. “Yeah, man.”

  “We’ve all done shit we’re not proud of. Put it behind you. Ball it up tight and stuff it so deep you never feel or think about it again. Do you think those jagoffs would even give you a second thought if you were buried in the ground?”

  I draw in a deep breath and close my eyes. “They would not.”

  “Damn fuckin’ right, they wouldn’t. They wouldn’t feel remorse or sadness. They would’ve spat on your grave and danced around your corpse. Don’t you forget that shit either.”

  “You’re right,” I grumble, not wanting to admit those words even if they are true.

  “Imagine if you would’ve died and what that would’ve done to your woman.”

  My chest tightens. Tamara would’ve been a mess. For all her sass and attitude, she has the softest heart and would’ve been forever changed by my death. I know this.

  “I could use another drink,” I tell him, wanting nothing more than to change the subject and lose myself for a night.

  “About damn time.” Eagle smiles, and the wrinkles near his eyes deepen. “I thought you’d gone completely soft on me.”

  “Old man, the only thing soft between the two of us is your dick.”

  “It may be soft, but it’s still big enough you’d choke on it.”

  I laugh. “I’m going to miss your dumb ass. You sure you don’t want to leave this place and join me?”

  He bends, reaching underneath to the small fridge, and comes up with two cold beers. “Like retire?” he asks, sliding one of the bottles toward me. “Do I look like I’m ready to retire?”

  I shake my head as I twist off the cap. “Not retire, but finally live. I’m opening a garage over there. You’re good with cars and bikes. I could use a partner.”